Oh God...I live in Asia

Somedays I walk out of my house and I can't help but think, "Oh my God. I live in Asia."*

Yes, that really is an old lady in flip-flops buying veggies off the back of a pick-up, then shuffling down the puddly street, back bent from carrying the kilos of food so that she cannot see the bright pink flowers dangling just over her bowed head.

Yes, that taxi really is pink. Hot pink. Barbie-style pink. Too bad it's also busy because now I have to wait a whole thirty seconds for the next one, which is red and white.

Yes, that really is squid frying on that sidewalk grill, roasting on sticks next to octopus. And yes, I can buy it for 5 baht. (10¢)**

Yes, there is only one other non-thai on the skytrain car and he is scaring me. His sunglasses don't fit and his white polo is stained and he gets off after one stop.

Yes, they are playing christmas music at the Asok skytrain station; What Child is This? actually. It sounds weird, but I have no clue why.

Yes, that is a beggar sitting next to the stairs with an empty cup o'noodles container*** stretched out for any satang that might come his way. And yes, he really is missing a hand. And the lower half of his leg.

Yes, that fruit hawker is sleeping under the station, leaning on a concrete pole, head drooping to her chest with her straw hat threatening to slip off into the traffic.

Yes, those tangled black lines suspended in a thick web about 5 m off the ground actually have a current running through them, supplying power and TV to the nearby houses and rang sewen.****

Yes, that motorcycle nearly nailed me. So did that cab. So did that car. So did that cab. So did that cop. And yes, there is a 'cross at your own risk' unwritten policy in this city.

Yes, that department store is decked out in pink and white shiny tinsel Christmas decorations and it's lit up too, but somehow, it's not cheery.

Yes, that is McDonald's...my destination. Because no matter how much the world has globalized and westernized, living in Asia is not like living in America. Sometimes you just have to have a few fries.

The Footnotes...
*yes, I said oh my God. But I don't think that is taking God's name for granted. I seriously meant it. "Oh God, I live in Asia."

**check out the calculator on Google.com. Just go to the main site, type in the conversion, and it'll convert anything from money to liquid, and do math problems too. It is the best when living in a metric country. (try 40 baht to USD)

***This is the container of choice for beggars here. I will never look at them the same again.

****wow, fourth. This is what the Thai's call 7-11. They're everywhere-imagine twice as many Starbucks in Naperville and that would be almost how many sevens. There is one every five minutes, walking speed, anywhere you go.